Thursday, May 23, 2013

Who Wants To Watch Pretty Little Liars With Me?



Season One: Episode Ten
Keep Your Friends Close





Turns out Ian is the new field hockey coach at the high school.  Typical.  They'll let anyone in this town work at that school.




Mona gives all the girls invites to her birthday "glamping" party, which I think is pretty generous considering Hanna's the only one who doesn't hate her.



Oh, A was invited to the party too!







Ha!  I also hate those automatic menus on the phone, Ashley.


Mona wants to ditch school to go birthday shopping, but she stupidly says that right in front of Ashley.  Poor Ashley.  It must be hard trying to stay super stylish in a small, pretentious town when everybody knows your husband left you for an uglier woman.  Seriously though, Ashley is a way better catch than the chick Hanna's dad is going to marry.  What was he thinking?



Aria must have, once again, gotten up at 3 AM to do laundry before school.  Don't these girls do any chores before bed?  Or are they too busy solving crimes?




Ew, Melissa.  What are you doing here?  Does she still live in the barn?  Looks like she may be ready to forgive Spencer for making out with Wren.









FLASHBACK



Ian is kissing Spencer's neck while helping her with hockey.  Is this how he's going to coach the kids at high school?  Because their parents are probably going to have a problem with it.


Oooo, Ali was spying!  And she's actually right for telling Spencer off for kissing him.  Damn it.  I like you Spencer, but you really need to break this habit of making out with your sister's boyfriends.  I think you have some issues.




Aw, Noel is sad because he can't go glamping with the girls.  Oh WAIT.



They're dating now?  Ew.  Chest bump.



Come on, Fitz.  Stop being so passive aggressive and just tell her you're jealous.




The cops are calling the girls into the office again.  Oh!  Dickface is gone!  And the FBI is here now.  So maybe they'll actually find something out?



I wonder how A got a hold of this video.  Unless he/she is the one filming.  I kind of like this yellow top of Ali's.

I find it hard to believe that Hanna has memorized every item that is in each of their closets.  These girls have never worn the same thing twice, especially Aria.




Ashley's extension for her mortgage is being denied.  She looks like she has a decent job, I wonder how much she makes?  I guess not enough to afford their house on just her salary.


Oh, shit.  That's a lot of money.  Where the fuck did that old lady get all that cash?  Is she a hooker?  And if there is nobody to inherit her money, why isn't she spending it all?  I would.





Ezra also writes poems?!  Duh, of course he does.  I don't know why I'm surprised.




Umm, go ahead and take all the butterscotch, lady.


Oh Ashley, I wish you would have just called after her to come back for her key.




Ugh.  Now A is texting Mona spreading rumors about Hanna?  And now she's uninvited to Camp Mona?!  Tragedy.


This whole scavenger hunt sounds really dangerous.




Wow, Aria's crying.  This must be a really good poem.



Ummm, you guys are fighting a little too loud with the door open.  I half expected that classroom to be full of students when the camera panned.


Oh shit, Noel.  Don't do this guys.

Okay.





Ian is creepily watching Melissa through the back door.  Don't go with him, Melissa.  I don't care what Spencer says.


A beret, Aria?

It would probably be a good idea for these girls to let each other in on all their secrets so they can help cover for each other when A eventually reveals them to the public.

That sweater that Ali was wearing in the video was Toby's so now the cops want to arrest him.

No, I just don't believe it.  Toby is cute, but I don't think Ali was dating him.  And he seems a little too dopey to kill someone.  Maybe he called her that night to...I don't know...see if she wanted his sweater?  And then she met up with her "older boyfriend?"




I hate how they're all talking like Toby has already been convicted.

Is A calling and hanging up now?  How mature.


Oh, it's just Emily's dad.




"People aren't dolls.  You can't just play with them and then put them back in the box."
That's nice, Ella.  Maybe someone should have said that to Ali.


This is kind of a touching lunch.  Or is it dinner?  Aren't the girls about to go camping?  What time is it?!




Uh oh.  Is Mrs. Emily lying about something?  What's in that envelope?


 Ohhhhhhhh.  So that's why A needed so many copies of the pictures.



Backtracking for just a moment, because I couldn't find an image of them talking in Spencer's room when she came back from having coffee with Ian.

I hate Melissa, but I like this outfit.  Too bad her face is so annoying.  Ew!  That was a really insensitive comment!  Just because she was a bitch doesn't mean she deserved to be murdered.  Ugh, I can't believe I'm defending Ali now.




Oh sonofabitch!  Toby popping out of the backseat almost made me throw my laptop.  I definitely yelled.
Hey, Toby!

Okay so the date on his tattoo actually represents the day he broke it off with Jenna.  Apparently she was planning on crying rape if Toby dumped her.  So wasn't she kind of raping Toby then?




Mona really went all out for this party.  There's a bar here? 



OKAY.  Toby called Ali to help him get away from Jenna the night she disappeared.  Why would you ever call Ali for help?  He gave her his sweater at Spencer's barn and then she drove off with some guy. 

He's right about not being able to tell the cops; they've pretty much already proclaimed him guilty.  God, I hate this town.

Okaaaay, Toby's running off to live with some of his prison friends?




Uh oh.  Bad cell service at the camp sight does not bode well.

But A's texts are coming through fine, which must mean that...dun dun DUUUN...A's at the campsite somewhere.  And wants them to go to where they found Ali's bracelet.

Oh, that's going to have to wait, because it's Aria and Emily's turn to get blown.


Hanna's hiding in the woods with her Vera Bradley bag, which is not at all conspicuous.



Oh, wow.  Emily and Aria look like Melissa at homecoming!


A Jenna bracelet?



Well that was awkward.


Stupid, stupid Ashley!  Why would you take the old lady's money?






NOOOOOOO!  Who did it?  Who called the cops?!




Is Hanna going to stay out here all night?


I really hate the idea of A hiding in this creepy playground.




Bad idea, meeting at a camp party where half of his students are, you guys.


And why are you wearing your beret UNDER your hoodie, Aria?


I wonder if Hanna can see them through the binoculars?


Yup!




Alison and Ian carved their names on a tree?  How...cliche.




Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!  Is that A?




FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!

Don't touch her!  She could have a spine injury!



ALI VIDEO

 


It's Ian filming.  Fuck you, Ryan Merriman.  Why couldn't you have stayed in Made-For-TV Disney movies?



Official Count
Coffee Sightings: 2
Ezra and Aria Make Their Relationship Obvious:  10 (I added bonus points for getting caught, TWICE)
Flashbacks: 1
Video Reveals: 2


Until next time, Bitches!



All screencaps courtesy of Fanpop and The Pretty Little Liars Wiki.

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