Friday, August 23, 2013

Who Wants To Watch Pretty Little Liars With Me?

Season Two: Episode Twenty-Two
Father Knows Best

So I guess Maya ran away and Emily got called into the police station so they could see if she knows where she is.

Hanna is trying to be nice about the whole thing, but I don't think Emily wants to talk about it.

Melissa is telling Spencer that she's been talking to Garrett because she needed someone to talk to about Ian.  She's still confused about how the man she loved could have been a murderer.  Now she thinks that she may have told Garrett too much.  Duh.

She's always crinkling her forehead.

And she also says that she thinks that Mr. Hastings reaction to Ali going missing was very strange, and that all the fighting their parents were doing around that time stopped as soon as she disappeared.  So what is Melissa saying?  That Mr. Hastings has something to do with Alison's death?

Melissa may have texted Ali a few times telling her to stop flirting with Ian.  She confessed doing so to Mr. Hastings.

Neither Melissa or Spencer really believe that their dad wasn't being blackmailed by Alison.

Ugh, there's some lame Father/Daughter Dance coming up and Byron is really excited about it.  Aria isn't, because she's still pissed at him for trying to get rid of Ezra.

Ella doesn't want Aria to tell Byron that she is trying to come to terms with their relationship.  Ummm, haven't you guys learned not to force your children to keep secrets for you?

Dickface is calling Ashley, wanting to know if she found out how Hanna got that police report.  She doesn't and all he did was piss her off.

Tom bailed on Hanna for the Father/Daughter Dance.  Congrats, Hanna.  It sounds really lame.

The girls get another text from A about them watching the video, and they all immediately blame Melissa.  Spencer is trying to convince them that it's not her, that Ali just received texts coming from that law firm because Melissa was asking her to stop fucking her boyfriend.  But Aria just gets pissed because I guess that hobo chased her.  Maybe next time you guys shouldn't try to steal his mail.

Is Hanna wearing a fur jacket?

As much as I hate Melissa, Spencer is making some good points.  Why would Melissa fake text HERSELF pretending to be Ian?  And she did seemed genuinely upset about his death.

Plus, haven't they noticed that the person in black chasing them is NOT several months pregnant?

Who got a present?

Oh, Spencer did, from their dad.  It's for this fucking dance.  Melissa says it's to shut her up.

Ashley is meeting Dickface in his car.  He wants her to snoop in Hanna's phone, or just give it to him to snoop in.  This is so illegal that I don't know what to do.  Isn't this whole private meeting thing to prevent him from being fired from BREAKING THE LAW?  So why do we want to break the law again?

So stupid.

Mona is complaining to Hanna about her community service.  Oh, great.  Couldn't Dickface and Ashley have picked a more private place to meet?  I thought they didn't want anyone to see them.

I really don't get the drama behind this.  So Hanna shoplifted?  That can't possibly be the worst thing anyone in this town has ever done.  Think about all the terrible shit Alison did when she was still alive.  Shoplifting is nothing compared to that.

Mike is shaving and trying to convince Aria to go to the Father/Daughter Dance with Byron to keep him from getting suspicious.

But he also wants to know why Aria would bother sneaking around so much if her relationship is doomed because of all the mess it's caused.  Oh, Mike.  You're too logical for this town.  Get out.

Emily's dad came up from Texas for the dance!  And he brought more coffee than necessary.

He's being really supportive about the whole Maya situation, though.  Offering to check the bus stations and stuff.

Mr. Hastings wants Spencer to play tennis or something, but she wants to study.  He thinks it's because she doesn't like the necklace, which is real mature.

After he leaves, Spencer decides to snoop in his office, which is really stressing me out.

Look at that giant check book.  Who needs a check book that big unless you run a business?

She's looking through the taxes?  Do you claim blackmail costs with your taxes?

Oh my God, there it is.

Melissa just walked in.  That's not a very flattering sweater.

The bus station guy is being kind of a dick and won't talk to Emily until Mr. Fields uses some sort of military code.  He says that Maya bought a ticket to San Francisco, but then started talking to someone in a dark car.  She might have left with the car, but he's not sure.  Great.

Byron still doesn't get that Aria might be mad at him.

Emily has a missed call from Maya.  She tries to call back, but the voice mail is full.  I hate when people call you and then don't answer when you call back!

Ashley wants answers from Hanna about the police report.  She's confiscating Hanna's phone, probably so she can give it to Dickface.  But Hanna is way too awesome for this shit and throws her phone in a sink full of water.  YES!

Emily's dad looks so nice for the dance!  Right now he is the only dad that doesn't suck.

Oh my God, so of course they're sending him back to Afghanistan.  Damn it!

How many dances does this school have?  Byron is all into the memories of dances past, and Aria wants him to shut the fuck up.  I kind of do too.  Why don't you go make out with Jodi, YOUR STUDENT?

Nice dress, Mona!

Hanna came to warn all the girls that her mom knows about the police report and is investigating.

Mona has an idea to get them out of it, but she says it's going to require a big lie.  She wants to know which of the girls is best at keeping secrets from someone close to them and all the girls point to Aria.

You've got to be fucking kidding me.  Aria is the most obvious with all her lies, she's just lucky her parents are oblivious.

This banner is the stupidest thing I've ever seen.

Spencer's portrait looks like her dad brought a hooker to this dance.

O-kay, she just told him all about snooping in his desk to find that check stub.  He's not admitting to shit.

Here's the big lie, I guess.  Aria wants to leave the dance NOW and she's being kind of a bitch to Byron.  I mean, I hate Byron and all, but that was a little cold.  Couldn't she just take the fucking photo?

Spencer's so pissed she can't even put her wrap on.

Who's that?  Toby?

This is just like Grease Two!

Okay, Hanna.  Are you just going to stay at this dance all night in your regular clothes and watch Emily and her dad?

Aria is in the kitchen with Ashley lying about the police report.  She's saying that she found Hanna shoplifting again and was worried that she would get caught again, so she sent her a fake report to scare her out of doing it again.  Good thing her name starts with A.

It worked!  Ashley believed her!  Why can't you lie that well all the time, Aria?

Mr. Hastings is freaking out about the drawer in his desk.  Oh yeah, because A took the gun from his desk.


My husband just made a masturbating gesture.

Mike wants Byron to lighten up on Aria.  God, he's so damn insightful.  Get out of this town, Mike.  You're better than all of us.

Yeah, you got caught with your perv folder, Mr. Hastings.  He says he has them because he hired a private investigator to look for Alison when she went missing because he thought someone he cared about was responsible.

Spencer starts talking about Jason, but Mr. Hastings meant MELISSA!

Damn it!  Stop playing with my head!

So the $15,000 went towards a private investigator?  Then where did Alison get the same amount of money?

Fuck, Melissa!  She wants to know what's going on with the cops.  She tells Spencer she doesn't feel safe staying there because of what their parents might be up to.  She wants Spencer to come stay with her if she gets scared.  I want so badly to believe that.

Ella and Ashley are talking about who A might be and how it's affecting the girls.  So, Ashley didn't believe Aria.  She wants to call the cops, but Ella thinks that's a bad idea.

Jonah is calling Aria!

Okay, are they meeting him?   They're in Brookhaven.  Apparently they are looking for an address where Alison was also getting texts from.

The street they're on has a creepy doll hospital full of creepy dolls.  Aria is cold and Emily tells her to grab a coat from the back of her car.  It's Vivian's coat.

Oh my God, somebody saw Aria in the coat and thought she was Vivian.  It's some guy.

A is buying a newspaper.  It has Maya on the cover.  Just like how Alison was!!!

Official Count
Messages From A: 1
Coffee Sightings: 2

Best Outfit
And the award goes to...

Mona's Dance Dress!

Until next time, Bitches!

All screencaps courtesy of Fanpop.

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